


walk on memories

by sasshee



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, but i dont know if it really worked??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:28:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26062696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sasshee/pseuds/sasshee
Summary: "I pass through the tunnel of time I spent longing for youAnd was given another chance to return to youYou’re just like you are in my memories"-Walk on MemoriesSehun walks down through his memory lane.
Relationships: Kim Junmyeon | Suho/Oh Sehun
Kudos: 8





	walk on memories

The soft yellow light from the lamp that is attached to the brick walls of his humble home lights up the balcony, accompanying him through the lonely, dark nights of his life.

  
He listens to the dulcet music that plays on the cassette player as he prepares his favorite tea that reminds him of his younger days.

It makes him want to reminisce about all the beautiful memories of the past, to walk down through his memory lane, the memory lane of their beautiful love. 

He sits on the chair at the balcony, watches the city lights as he begins to recollect those memories.

He first fell in love when he was 18. And he was so lucky enough that his first love eventually became his last.

Rare.  


It is a unique kind of love. Oh, to be the first and last love of someone. It was an exquisite type of love.

He remembers the time when he first saw the only man he set his eyes upon.

Beautiful. Gorgeous. Ravishing. He doesn't know what the perfect word to describe him is. His petite body that holds all those cheeks he has, his smile that melts his heart, those lovely eyes and those brows of him which makes him lovelier. All of him is stunning.

He saw him coo over a crying little girl who seemed to have lost her parents while they were walking around the park.

The way he held and gently caressed her hands as he tried to make the girl calm down while they waited for her parents to come back.

The way he embraced her before letting the child go with her parents, smiling and waving goodbye to them as they started to walk away.

The man is clearly full of love. And that's the whole point of Sehun loving him. 

That time, Sehun was so sure that he saw that thin line of red string around their pinky fingers, connecting the two of them together.

Sehun was so sure that he was already the one.

One hot summer afternoon, Sehun went to the park for a quick stroll as he was craving for something cold and sweet today.

There, for the second time around, he met the pretty boy that he claimed to be his first love again. He smiles at him, trying to be as cool as possible as he tries to initiate a conversation about such a lame topic but still, ice creams.

"You're funny," his heart flutters over that simple compliment. No, he wasn't that humorous. What's so funny in laughing over that little sound (okay that sounded like a fart) that the ice cream machine had made. No, it wasn't funny at all. That was so childish and embarrassing, he had to admit, especially when you did it in front of your crush.

"I'm Sehun," he says as he chuckles then he continues, "that was so embarrassing of me."

"Sehun, it isn't, I swear. I had thought about it too but I'm just too shy to laugh...especially in front of a man like you," he says and Sehun saw him giggled. It was such a sight. He looks so cute. "I'm Junmyeon, by the way."

Junmyeon. Such a lovely name. He held his hands as gently as he could when the man offered it for a handshake.

Junmyeon was a nice person. He had all the best qualities that a person can possess. They hang out together, having ice cream sessions every afternoon. Eventually, after some months, they both agreed to start seeing each other.

Sehun still remembers the first time when he says 'I love you' to his dear love, Junmyeon. It was when Sehun asked him to go out with him. It was a happy memory. Junmyeon was smiling widely, his eyes went almost missing.

He smiles at that recollection. Those were their glory days.

He remembers it when he said that lovely word to him when they were cuddling while watching a movie. 

He remembers it vividly when he had told Junmyeon that he loves him so much over their morning coffee.

He is much taller than him, so every time something is placed at a high place, Junmyeon would always whine about it, he would always call Sehun to get it for him and Sehun would always lean down and give him a peak on his lips before giving his stuff to him.

He proposed to him one spring night, and he got to have his sweet yes, which was followed by a fervid kiss that lasted for a few minutes, just right before they ran out of their breaths.

They held an intimate wedding in a garden, inviting just a few important people in their lives. Flowers. Oh yes, Junmyeon used to love flowers of different kinds. He used to be a beautiful butterfly, sniffing the scent of all those flowers.

He used to proclaim his love for Junmyeon every day. The moment they wake up to the moment they close their eyes. They never fail to say their I love you's to each other.

Their love was way too good to be true. Imagine marrying your first love. Imagine achieving those without suffering.

Everything was too good. And that time has come. It was truly unexpected but it was somehow expected in some ways, that something bad is about to happen. All happy things have consequences. And Sehun wasn't the one who believes in that...in the past. 

However, when the doctor said that his husband has only three months to live, his world fell apart.

He remembers saying I love you to Junmyeon almost every moment, excessively. He had to cherish each moment that is left for them.

He wants him to be filled with his love. He wants him to feel all the love that he has to offer.

Sehun remembers how he had told Junmyeon the three words, those beautiful expressions while he looks at his eyes directly, full of love and at the same time, sorrow when Junmyeon was admitted in the hospital, those IV lines pierced through his veins. Junmyeon was so weak already, his pinkish lips turned almost white already but he still manages to smile at Sehun and reply to his 'i love you's'   


He said 'I love you' to Junmyeon, for the last time, on his deathbed.

Now, as he reminisces those memories, at his old age, his tears start to fall. He wants to meet him again. The sooner, the better. He is already old, his hair turned all white already and his fair, handsome face has wrinkles already.

He stares to the sky, silently praying to all those who can hear him grant his wish already. He can't do anything much for this world at his age, he isn't capable of doing anything anymore so what's the point of keeping him alive?

He never loves someone again. He sticks to his vow in front of the wedding altar. That through thick and thin, through sickness and in health, till death do them apart, he'll never love another person. And until the end, it is still Junmyeon. Will be and always be him.

Soon, he'll meet his lover again.

Soon, he'll meet Junmyeon again. 

Soon, he'll be able to say those little fluttering words to him again.

He closed his eyes and realized that he isn't on the balcony of his house. Now, he is in the intensive care unit area and was admitted almost a month ago.  


In his mind, he smiles. He is really walking down through his memory lane. It usually happens after someone dies, however in his case, it happened earlier than usual. He is still breathing.

He smiles in his mind again. The idea of meeting Junmyeon in the afterlife makes him giddy.

  
So for the last time, he breathes in the last supply of oxygen that he'll have, he recollects the last beats of his favorite music, and he recalls Junmyeon's face for the last time, as the line on the machine that is attached to his body went straight.  


**Author's Note:**

> i don't know how to write angst im sorry sjjsjsjsjs if you want, you can leave me something here^^


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